Survivor Stories

Tessa’s Story:

In ninth grade I was in a Healthy Relationships Group at school. After what the Advocate talked about, I decided to stay after I told her that my mom’s boyfriend is abusive and that I took the handouts from group home and shared them with my mom. My mom was surprised to recognize that the handouts were describing her relationship with her boyfriend. I told my mom she deserves better and didn’t judge. My mom wanted to leave but wasn’t sure how. My Advocate talked to me about safety planning, and I gave my mom her card.

 After group ended, my mom decided to stand up for herself and go out with friends. She broke up with her boyfriend and asked him to move out. I learned that my mom had called DAWN and was doing safety planning to keep herself and our family safe. It made me really, really proud of her.

Gabby’s Story:

My papa had a terrible accident when he burned down his house. Mama said we had to move because it wasn’t safe. I don’t remember much about him now because I was only three. But I know I got a baby brother and my mom and my older sister and I have been taking care of him, and we moved into an apartment where I have my own bed. It’s really nice.

Andrea’s Story:

I love my daddy, but I remember a time he was very mean to my mom. When I was five years old, he hurt her so much we had to run away in the middle of the night. It’s obviously bad to hit and kick people and pull their hair, but he did that to my mom. But our nice neighbors a few blocks away helped us get help. He wasn’t allowed to come home until he learned to stop hurting people. He eventually did come back home and we got to live like a family again. Now that I’m in middle school, I can see why people sometimes get divorced and families sometimes can’t live together. My dad is still mean sometimes, but instead of beating up my mom now he goes outside to smoke, or he drives off too fast.

Nina’s Story:

My husband called it a fight. I called it hell. He was trying to kill me. Somehow, I crawled away and he got distracted. I called 911 and he ran. Puget Sound Fire arrived just after he drove off. It was hard to talk because I was crying so hard and my whole body was shaking and hurting. I knew my baby and I needed to leave right away, but we had no one to call, nowhere to go, and no time to get ready.  The fire department called DAWN, and they got us approved for the emergency shelter. They got a hotel room for me and my daughter, and DAWN paid for an Uber to get me and the baby to their safe confidential shelter the next morning. They had everything we needed, from a welcome basket, clothes and pajamas, food and a safe, secure place to stay. I left everything. I didn’t even have my cell phone. Now I’m building a new life for my baby. I know if we didn’t leave, we wouldn’t be alive today. The nightmares still are very real.

Ellen’s Story:

My teenage son and I were living on the streets, often sleeping in doorways, but this was a safer option than living with my abusive husband. I managed to change schools for my son’s safety but that meant a 2 and ½ hour bus ride each morning for him to classes. This was the third school for him in a year due to fleeing the abusive household and having to repeatedly relocate to avoid being found and hurt by his dad. Even in chaos, I knew my son’s education must be a top priority.

We were referred to DAWN’s emergency confidential shelter as risk of harm was imminent. Despite our best efforts, my son was approximately half a year behind in credits and at risk of not graduating on time. Within days of arrival, he was enrolled in full-time high school, and both of us were able to sleep at night, eat regular meals and feel safe. In a matter of weeks, my son felt safe enough to ask for and receive the support he needed to engage with peers and trusted adults. Amazingly, by the end of the school year he had made up for the gap in credits through his extra work and the stability the family was experiencing. We moved to a transitional housing apartment that was a safe home. Thankfully my son was able to continue at the same school with much success. This couldn’t have happened without the support we got from DAWN. We are so grateful to all the people who made that support possible.

Mary’s Story:

I was leaving a five-year abusive and very controlling relationship with the father of my three-month-old daughter. In addition to the abuse, during the past three years, we’d been homeless several times. He couldn’t keep a job even though he made sure I was financially dependent on him, without stable income.

During my stay at DAWN’s House, I participated actively in all services we offered such as support groups, parenting workshops, coping skills support groups, etc. In addition, I met on a very regular basis with advocates along with the mental health counselor. DAWN even offered a tech safety class where I learned more about safety and technology, and I was able to get a free personal computer after participating in a computer literacy class. I gained knowledge about domestic violence, and I built confidence regarding safety for myself and my daughter. I learned to identify and utilize community resources to meet my family’s needs. Through DAWN’s programs and services, my daughter and I received subsidized permanent housing and ongoing case management. For the first time in many years, we can be safe in our own stable home, free from abuse.

Cathy’s Story:

I entered Dawn’s House convinced I was too broken to ever alleviate all the shame, fear and grief I felt for letting my life become a downward spiral of disaster. I was a grown woman who had at one time a very good job, a nice, rented townhouse, decent credit, and a fully paid for nice SUV. How was it that only two years later because of my abuser I had become homeless and had lost all the respect of my children, former friends and co-workers, family, etc. as well as my own self-respect?

Dawn’s House offered so many wonderful, amazing healing resources and all I had to do was say “yes!” Due to the decades of my experience of domestic violence, I had literally forgotten that my authentic self already had the qualities and capability and lived the values exemplified at DAWN’s House. I am grateful for healing and no longer willing to tolerate abuse and manipulation from anyone. Thank you.

Jenny’s Story:

It escalated after my son was born. What had started as an occasional slap or a push – turned into a constant episode, what I referred to as his “meltdowns.” I was ashamed, horrified and hopeless. He’d stated many, many times that I’d be dead if I ever tried to leave. He made it clear that he had “tools” available and that nobody would ever find me. It was more than realistic. It was a living nightmare. I believed him. To this day he claims he never said that.

I tried to stay with him, kow-towing to everything he said and did, until the night he took me hostage and kept me prisoner until midafternoon the next day, when I was able to make my escape to safety with my son. He kept us physically separated, so escaping was almost impossible. I’d never leave my son.  Shortly after, a friend of mine at the office told me about DAWN. I didn’t trust or believe anybody, I’d been betrayed by everybody. Those closest to me were saying things like “Why would anybody stay in a situation like that?” They never understood that I couldn’t leave. I’d be dead and so would my son. We chose a new start, a new life, a new family. I am remarried.  I will not lie, the nightmares are still there, but every day, it gets better. I can honestly say it’s been months since a nightmare. There are not enough agencies like DAWN.

Virginia’s Story:

I nearly died when my husband in rage shoved my head against a metal hook in the wall and then pushed me down the stairs.  That gave me 3 broken ribs, a collapsed lung, a concussion and a broken leg.  When I got home from the hospital, I took only enough time to gather my girls and find safe shelter, so I didn’t have to face him again.  Law enforcement had not been able to locate him.  My two small girls, ages 3 and 5, and I stayed at DAWN’s House for two months.

After a couple of weeks at shelter, we first heard news over the airwaves that an apartment had been engulfed in flames and a man severely burned.  My husband was burned, over 50% of his body.  Everything in the apartment was gone.  We went to the hospital with my advocate the next day.  With the help of DAWN staff, family, law enforcement support, and my own determination to create a new life for me and my children, I chose to turn away from the vortex and towards building a new life.  My baby boy was born a few months later. I was grateful to be surrounded by support from DAWN, other social service agencies and from the systems advocates from the city where we lived. We found a new home, and I rejoined the workforce, working in social services to support crime victims.   

Diana’s Story:

He slammed me into the wall.  It only lasted a second. It hurt a lot but then it was over. He stopped and went outside for a cigarette as if nothing had happened. But I knew that what he did wasn’t right. A month later he grabbed me and dragged me by my hair down the hall, into the other room. My 5-year-old daughter Andrea was watching. I tried to close the bedroom door, but he kicked it off the hinges. He let me throw some clothes into a suitcase. Andrea and I left on foot because he wouldn’t let me have car keys. We started walking up the cold, dark, lonely street and up to a house that had lights on. Hysterical, I asked to use the phone.  I called my friend and her husband. They came, took us to their home, nursed us, made us tea, let us cry, and put us to bed.

The next morning, I woke up sore and bruised with a swollen face.  When I brushed my beautiful long hair, it came out in fistfuls, big clumps. My arms were covered in bruises.  When I tried to dress for work, I had to wear long sleeves to cover all the bruises. Next day, I called a DV Center.  I gave him the paperwork from the Center that explained all about DV, the phases, what to do, all of it.  I handed it to him and said, ‘There are people here to help you. Don’t come home until you talk to them and have a plan.’  He decided to go to the training, and for a while we reunited. I honestly don’t know what would have happened to my daughter and me if we hadn’t got help step by step to find the right path. I do know that the outcome would have been very different the next time because statistics prove it.

Merina’s Story:

I knew I had found my ideal partner. He was from the Seattle area and had been working there and in Russia on his maritime cargo shipping business Soon after coming to Seattle, I felt isolated as my husband allowed me only to see mutual friends when he was present. He began to criticize my intelligence and to posture himself as more likeable, stable, appealing and productive. He was gone increasingly more of the time with little explanation. When he came home, he was aloof unless he was losing his temper. I was not allowed to visit family. When our baby Martine was born, the abuse escalated, beginning with shoves and breaking things. About six months before coming to shelter, he had slammed his closed fist into the side of my head, directly into my temple. It caused ringing in my ears for days and spells of dizziness and nausea. I was too afraid to seek medical help as my husband warned that he would take Martine and leave – and that I would never find my daughter again.

On the night I finally decided to leave, my husband threatened to murder me and Martine. When he went out, I began calling shelters and came to DAWN’s House the following morning. During the 2 months we stayed at DAWN’s House, we safety planned, learned resources and with  DAWN’s kind staff I finally felt a bit at home for the first time since leaving my family. I felt good about getting my paperwork in order. Most of all, I felt safe once again and free to look ahead to see a hopeful future for us.

Amina’s Story:

We had been married for a decade, and he had made threats to harm me and my daughter before. He was extremely jealous and was always controlling where I could go and who I could be with. He started making more threats and said terrible things to me and my daughter. I was really scared that he would hurt or kill me or my daughter. I didn’t really know anyone who could help me.

I called 911. The police came to my house when my husband was gone and took me and my daughter to the police station. They called DAWN’s House hoping that me and my daughter could get into the shelter. Once I was at shelter my daughter and I learned about domestic violence, safety planning and community resources. We were only at the shelter for a few weeks because we found out that we could go live with relatives in another state and be safe. I felt like I had a new life and that without DAWN, I didn’t know where we would be. Now I feel more able to take care of myself and my daughter and I know that I am not alone.

Faye’s Story

Someone I knew gave me the number to DAWN’s crisis line and after gathering up my courage I finally decided to call. A DAWN advocate listened to my story about my husband and his disrespectful and controlling behavior. I realized that my husband could easily track me through my e-mails or my cell phone and probably was. Talking to the advocate was the first time I was able to see what was happening in my relationship. At first, I was scared, and I didn’t know how I was going to leave and support myself, but I knew I had to get away from my husband before it got even worse. I talked with my advocate and came up with a safety plan. Eventually I was able to get a space in DAWN’s House; Once I got to the shelter, I felt safer and more secure than I had in years. For the first time in a long time that I was able to take a deep breath and not worry about what my husband might do